All I Really Want
by B00kw0rm92
Summary: Sam is heading out for some last minute Christmas shopping when a song comes on the radio that sends his thoughts back in time. / Perfectverse one-shot songfic!


Sam Evans was heading out for some last minute Christmas shopping when he heard it. He had turned the radio on in the car Phil and Jessica had let him drive and turned it to a station playing Christmas music. He hadn't expected the first song to start playing to be one that hit so close to home. In the past, he had avoided listening to it whenever possible, but he thought that now it would be different. When the words began he found himself carried back in time.

_"Well, I don't know if you remember me or not _  
><em>I'm one of the kids they brought in from the home" <em>

The Christmas when Sam was eleven was spent in a group home. He had been there for a few months already and he had begun to like it there. He knew that they were helping him and that maybe soon he would be better enough for another family to take him. They had all been taken to visit Santa recently to tell him what they wanted before they made their little paper angel's saying similar things.

_"I was the red-haired boy in an old, green flannel shirt _  
><em>You may not have seen me, I was standing off alone" <em>

He might not have had red hair, but it was definitely closer to strawberry blond back then. He had been on his best behavior that day. He decided it was best to leave Santa for the younger children and not even get involved. He would be polite and calm and he would show them that he could be good.

_"I didn't come and talk to you 'cause that's never worked before _  
><em>And you'll probably never see this letter, anyway" <em>

He didn't really believe in Santa anymore. Sure, nobody had ever confirmed it one way or the other, but he didn't see the point in the paper angel's if Santa was real, and the whole Santa story seemed fishy to him anyway. Even so, some small little part of him refused to give up on anything that might help and so once they had gotten back he had found a quite spot and began to write a letter.

_"But just in case there's something you can do to help me out _  
><em>I'll ask you one more time" <em>

He asked for the same thing he asked for every year. The same thing he had asked for since he was seven years old. He prayed for it every night and he asked Santa ever year. It hadn't happened yet, but he couldn't help but hope that maybe that year it finally would.

_"All I really want for Christmas is someone to tuck me in _  
><em>A shoulder to cry on if I lose, shoulders to ride on if I win <em>  
><em>There's so much I could ask for, but there's just one thing I need <em>  
><em>All I really want for Christmas is a family" <em>

The people in the group home were nice. They took care of them all and did their best to keep them happy, but it just wasn't the same. They weren't parents. They weren't even foster parents. All he wanted was what he had never had. He wanted a family.

_"Well, I guess I should go ahead and tell you now _  
><em>If it's really true about that list you have <em>  
><em>Somehow I always seem to end up in a fight <em>  
><em>But I'm really trying hard not to be bad" <em>

He hadn't ever meant to cause trouble, but he had just been so angry. When the Witmore's sent him away he didn't understand it. He hadn't done anything wrong and suddenly he was being taken to another home without any reason at all. They hadn't wanted him just like his mother hadn't wanted him. She had never even tried to get him back. It wasn't fair.

He hadn't meant to, but everything just made him snap after that. He was in fight after fight until his new family sent him away too, but that time he knew exactly why. He was getting better though. There were a lot of people to talk to and a lot of animals to play with at the group home. They were helping him to stop being so angry all the time. He was going to get better so he could have another chance.

_"But maybe if I had a brother or a dad to wrestle with _  
><em>Well, maybe they could teach me how to get along" <em>

He couldn't help but think that it would be so much easier if he just had someone to play fight with, like so many of the other boys he knew. Maybe it would be better if he had that. But then again, the whole reason he was so angry was because he didn't.

_"And from everything I've heard, it sounds like the greatest gift on earth _  
><em>Would be a mom" <em>

He had never really had a mom, even when he technically did. She never cared about him, at least not that he remembered. The way everyone at school had always talked, he couldn't help but think that having a real mom would be wonderful. He had to bite his tongue so often when he heard people complain that their parents were too strict or that they wouldn't buy them what they wanted. He couldn't afford to get in more fights, but they didn't know how lucky they were.

_"All I really want for Christmas is someone to tuck me in _  
><em>A shoulder to cry on if I lose, shoulders to ride on if I win <em>  
><em>There's so much I could ask for, but there's just one thing I need" <em>

He would give anything to have parents. Real ones that he could stay with until he grew up and maybe ever afterwards. Sometimes he spent hours imagining grandparents and aunts, uncles and cousins, thinking about what it would be like to have brothers and sisters who were always there and didn't come and go all time. Honestly, he didn't really care if he had all that though. It would be nice, but he just wanted parents, or even just one. Just a mom or just a dad would be better then no parents at all.

_"All I really want for Christmas is someone who'll be here _  
><em>To sing me happy birthday for the next 100 years" <em>

He wanted a constant. Just to have someone who wouldn't go away, who would always care about him. It was something that he never remembered having and he craved it. He just wanted someone to really love him.

_"And it's okay if they're not perfect or even if they're a little broken _  
><em>That's alright, 'cause so am I" <em>

He didn't care if they didn't have much money or they had to work a lot. As long as they would love him, that was all that mattered. He didn't have right to expect anyone to be perfect, he was far from perfect himself.

_"Well, I guess I should go, it's almost time for bed _  
><em>Maybe next time I write you I'll be at home" <em>

Sam had finished the letter before carefully putting it into his pocket and heading off to find Mrs. Smart. He knew that she would make sure the letter got where it needed to go. Maybe the next year he could give the letter to his mom or dad. Maybe next year, the letter would be asking for something different.

_"'Cause all I really want for Christmas is someone to tuck me in _  
><em>Tell me I'll never be alone, someone whose love will never end" <em>

A family was all he wanted. It was all he had ever wanted. As he headed to bed, he had convinced himself that surely if he kept asking and kept praying, someday he would have it.

_"Of all that I could ask for, well, there's just one thing I need _  
><em>All I really want for Christmas is a family " <em>

Sam smiled as the song ended. He had never written another letter to Santa, because the Mason's never would have allowed it, but he hadn't stopped praying and he had been right back then. He hadn't gotten a family that year, but he had one now. As much as he wished he would have had a family for his whole life, he knew that the Turner's were worth the wait. He finally had a family and this Christmas he really couldn't think of anything else he wanted.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> I hope this was okay. I've never written a song-fic before, but this song was just so perfect for Sam (no pun intended) and it's one of my favorites. The song is "All I Really Want" by Steven Curtis Chapman. I know some people wanted a little more background info on Sam, so I hope this helped with that.


End file.
